We depend on many people in our lives and even circumstances can have a big influence on our choices. Even if you say you are totally independent we all know that's not completely true. That's what life is all about: we live in a society that influences our lifestyle in a way we sometimes don't even notice. And it doesn't necessarily mean it is a bad thing. But it certainly gets harder and harder to get control of your life understanding that you are the one who is responsible for it, not other people or circumstances. And even when we want to earn some acceptance or recognition from others we have to understand that the stamp of approval can be the driving force of our choices. Otherwise, you might end up very far from the place where you always wanted to be. So when it comes to big career choices you need to focus on what you want and what you need in terms of your professional development, even if it doesn't go well with the reassurance of others.
Why You Matter More?
First of all, you have to know one very important truth about people giving their approval or providing some reassurance to others. In most cases, they don't really make an informed decision either to support or criticize you. That's our nature - we tend to make quick judgments based on what we feel or what seems to be reasonable to us. Very often we never try to really understand the issue enough until we express our own opinion. The snap judgments and remarks may have nothing to do with reality and maybe those people would have never expressed them if they had paid some time to understand the subjects. But who cares about that, right? So don't allow someone who doesn't even know what you are talking about (even if it someone very close to you in personal life) destroy your enthusiasm and make you change the decision.
It often pays off pretty badly in the long run. We are not saying that you should never listen to what others have to say. What we are trying to communicate is that whatever other people say may not have the value we tend to give to those words. But even if those negative comments are given by knowledgeable people it is your life and it is up to you to make decisions that will define your career future. You have the right to go through all of the mistakes. It's a part of the deal, right? This is how we all forge our own life path. After you have turned a grown up you are free to make choices you believe are the best ones for you. So keep your head high and go ahead with the things you have always wanted to do but someone or something was keeping you from doing them. Again, we are not against considering the opinions of other people be it your co-workers, managers, family members or friends. Just keep in mind that other people base their decisions on the values they have (which may not be the same ones that you have). You are the one who will have to live with your values and your decisions. So what we recommend is focus on the decisions and choices that give you a sense of fulfillment, and forget about others. Because in the long run, your approval matters way more than the one you can get from your boss or your friends.
